Leaving Den Haag

The last couple of days have been relatively uneventful. Sal and I have been watching loads of porn (who knew double penetration was so popular?) but the awkwardness of last Sunday has not been repeated. I guess she has read He is Just Not That Into You as well, especially the chapter He's not that into you if he doesn't want to have sex with you.

Anyway, the two gay clubs here, Stairs and Friends, are only open on the weekend so I have been spending my days sightseeing and evenings eating lovely meals with sal. It has been nice to catch up on old times and sift through her photos of us over the years.

Yesterday I spent the day at Scheveningen, a North Sea beach resort - read COLD, hiking through the dunes and examining the sleeping remnants of Nazi monsters. Today unfortunate looking rich people and I jockied for a decent view of the Vermeers on display at the Maurithaus. The play of light in the View of Delft is exquisite. I learnt the word for Lady!, mevrouw, when I got too close to the tiny little dots in the painting.

Tomorrow I am to Amsterdam. They have several gay bars there :)

Rachel **

Inside Peaches

Fresh fruit (not the staff, please!) salad
- Menu item at Scallywags, Den Haag

The day started off lazy. South Asian lovely, aka sal, let me sleep in until eleven, fed me a big feed and then took me into town. Den Haag is a beautiful city of cobble stoned streets, canals, open tree filled squares and plenty of cyclists and trams to dodge. We shopped, sauntered, purchased me a SIM card, savoured for cream tea and basically made a relaxing day of it.

At one point we stopped in what can best described as a pharmacy without the pharmaceuticals, seeking hair product. After awhile, sal led me to an array of vibrators on display in the window. She had loads of questions.

"Rachel, what does this one do? Why is there a rabbit there?"
"Oh, that bit goes ... while that other piece slips in ... "
"Would this really fit on any vibrating toothbrush?"

Now that question made me pause. I stopped and looked at the small red silicon brush visible in the package's window and the diagram on how to screw it onto any electronic tooth brush. Made in Canada? I pursed my lips. Could it be that the lovely undergrad I had been fortunate enough to encounter four years ago had quit her fine arts degree to mass produce the, um, modified vibrating toothbrush she had so happily demoed to me at the time? Guess I'll never know for sure.

We left the store empty handed, returned to Sal's large flat and the 24/7 porn channel just in time for Inside Peaches: Hot stories written for Peaches by Peaches' female fans. Sal began to question me as the episode's story unfolded and I began to question a few things myself.

"Is this really how lesbians have sex?"
"Some might. Yeah, it seems fairly accurate. Their nails are a bit long and I'd be moving in closer."
"What's she doing now?"
I explained. "But, I'd probably put my fingers the other way."
"Really?"
"Yeah."

There was a long pause while I considered how uncomfortable I was watching pseudo-lesbian porn with a close platonic pal. Our hands touched in the popcorn bowl.

"Ya know what, I'm going to have a shower and get some sleep."
"Would you like some company?"

A really awkward pause followed. Finally, I broke it.
"No thanks. It has been a fun day. I'll see you tomorrow."

I slipped off, had a shower and quietly read He's Just Not That Into You in the spare room. It's actually quite a useful book.

Rachel *** (dodging action)

p.s. I had my eyebrows done while we were out shopping. I'll upload a decent shot of me to my facebook profile for dykoon.

p.p.s. To be honest, I was a bit shy above as I didn't want sal to see the symetrically placed bite breath , bite breath bruises tracing the insides of my thighs. (I don't tell you everything).

Den Haag

Hello from the Hague, Netherlands! I am writing from south asia lovely`s Swiss French keyboard which is trickier than expected. Why are the 'z' and 'y' swapped?

South asia lovely is a cute transplanted Montreal street funk who is living here in expat redux. She has an unusually spacious apartment with a view, something not to be sneezed at here in the land of three story brick edifices. Today is a bit grey but I'm not complaining. Beautiful Dutch women whiz past me on their bicycles pumping their calves into perfection.

I arrived in the Netherlands yesterday just before noon as my flight was five hours delayed leaving Montreal. The delay was annoying but when the airline feels the need to change the entire plane due to a fuel leak, I'd rather wait out the five hours than get on a death trap.

I was feeling a bit groggy from jet lag and last week's adventures so really appreciated that south asian lovely had driven the forty five minutes from the Hague to pick me up at Schiphol in the cutest little blue car. Perhaps because of my grogginess, it took me a shower and cup of coffee to realise how much south asian lovely has sexed it up since the last time I saw her. Always cute, the woman is now hot hot hot in an alterna executive way. Or how would you describe a classy euro dresser with deep purple tips tracing the jags of her ebony locks?

By the time I had awoken to her increased loveliness, it was time for the "Welcome Rachel" dinner whose main feature was the most delicious melt in your mouth fall off the bone chicken curry I have ever had. That really is something that Montreal lacks in the downtown core, decent Indian. The other dinner guests were expats who, like south asian lovely, work for international justice organizations here in The Hague. As you can imagine, the dinner conversation was scintillating. I sat wide eyed and silent listening in awe to the real stories behind the slivers of truth we receive in the Canadian press. It also struck me that I need to get over my tedious middle class angst. Sure, I have work related conflicts but the people I have conflicts with are not alleged mass murderers.

Getting over herself,
Rachel (nil)